Articles
Stress
Management for Today
By:
Maureen O'Donnell, M.S.
Everyone could benefit from knowing
that stress exists as a normal part of daily life. It seems as though
today, we have more stress to deal with than ever before. Some stress
is within our control to manage, some is not. The most effective
stress management includes keeping our thoughts, beliefs and behaviors
both realistic and healthy.
A simple, generic definition of stress
describes it as the physical, mental and chemical reaction to
circumstances that cause fear, excitement, irritation, or
endangerment. These attitudes affect our body with a variety of
chemical changes, which in turn produce other dramatic physical and
mental changes.
Given that definition, you can see how
stress is a normal part of our life today. Some people report feeling
stressed upwards to ninety percent of their day. When we conduct
stress management seminars, we find that ¾ of the people attending
report feeling “overwhelmed” by stress.
Today we are stressed, and today we
need to care for ourselves and teach our children and invite others to
do the same.
Following are some techniques that will
help:
Develop A Positive Attitude:
How you perceive a situation determines
how you experience it. It’s easy to fall into negative ways of
seeing difficult experiences.
Seeing crises as opportunities will
expand your options. A positive attitude means more than just doing
positive things. It also means a positive lifestyle, an active,
day-by-day approach to your life.
Reach Out
When you’re feeling low, you may be
tempted to keep well-wishers at an arm’s length.
Asking for love, encouragement, honest
and caring feedback, or just an understanding ear can help you get
back on course.
Reach out to those who care about you
and who can help you see things as positively as possible.
Communicate
There is no single factor that has more
potential for expressing concern and respect for others than the way
in which people speak and listen to each other.
Share thoughts, feelings and behavior
about what is happening in an open and honest way.
Confirm by our responses the other
person’s worth and value.
Have A Talk With Yourself
We talk to ourselves all the time—usually
critically. But negative self-talk just makes you feel worse. Instead
of saying, “You sure blew that one,” try talking to yourself
positively. “You learned that new step very well." Notice all
the little things you do right. Make lists of your positive
accomplishments, and post them in visible places.
Monitoring Your Self-Talk
When you say things to yourself like:
“I hate myself; I’m lousy at everything: I’m a terrible parent:
My boss is a total jerk: Life is so unfair: I can’t stand waiting a
minute longer; He shouldn’t have done that: That job is impossible.”
These are all examples of negative self-talk.
The next time something stressful
occurs, listen to your self-talk and jot down a record of what
happens.
Laugh
Humor is one of the best stress relievers going.
Take the time to find the humor in your situation. Humor and worry don’t
mix. Research shows that laughing actually makes people healthier.
A Change of Scenery
Sometimes “getting away from it all”
is exactly the thing to do. It’s hard to take your problem so
seriously when you change your perspective. Change your routine—if
you work indoors, take a walk in the woods; if you work outdoors, do
something indoors, like going to a museum or a movie.
Live the Wellness Way
Taking good care of your health will
help you handle stress more successfully. Get exercise and enough
rest, eat a balanced, healthy diet, and you’ll be ready for change.
Relax and Let Go
Successful coping depends on being able
to relax and let everything go from time to time. The body needs to
renew itself and recharge. You might try meditation, visualization,
yoga, hot baths, listening to music, or simply a restful sleep.
Some Don’ts
Some activities do not reduce stress in
the long run—in fact they may make things worse.
Don’t abuse drugs, alcohol, or even
coffee, cigarettes, or food: they can drain your energy.
Don’t spend money on things you can’t
afford—that will drain your finances.
Don’t rely on sympathy; use positive
coping skills, which will pay you back in vitality and results.
Copyright © 2004 by Arbor Family
Counseling Associates
